Your Daughter's Self Esteem
Helping your daughter through one of the toughest times in life.
By: Taylor_Blue on: Sun 22 of Apr, 2007 [22:40 UTC] (2255 reads)
My daughter has always been one of those girls who never worried about what others think of her. But that was until she started middle school. Now she has a new set of challenges to deal with. The new pressures she has to think about are the issues of her sexuality (she sees kids kissing in the halls and wonders when she’ll get her turn), her body image (She wants to shave her legs and wear a bra), and society’s pressures (she feels like everyone wants her to act her age). And the biggest issue would be self-esteem.
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Kids are relentless today, they aren’t afraid to throw around hurtful words. They are in a whole different league then when I was in high school twelve years ago. Bullies get a hold of our precious children and tear them down. Here are ways we can build them up.
Love is an important part of self-esteem. It is the love they feel from parents that make them confident that they are something special in this big world. The biggest gift we can give our children is to love them completely and without limit.
How can we show them that we love them? Showing love can be hard for some parents. Seeing your daughter growing up you wonder how much love they really want you to show. But don’t be afraid to express your love to her openly. Tell your daughter you love her as often as you can. Give your daughter notes in her lunches, text message her on her cell phone or make her favorite homemade cookies. Make it something you do everyday.
Life doesn’t always happen the way we want it to. Occasionally, it means your children will be put through things we rather they not go through. All children respond differently to stress and emotional turmoil. It just seems that most things are not positive. This gives parents a great challenge. The most important thing you can do is to “Hang in there.” You may think it is stressful but you need to be there to support your daughter. Spend as much time as possible with her. It may be taking her someplace special where you two can laugh and talk together.
Self-esteem thrives when you can create a situation where your daughter can grow, experiment and take chances without worry. This can be achieved by clear and dependable rules. They feel safe when they know the rules and your expectations for them. When making rules for them create ones that you can live with. At the same time, when you say no to her, mean no. Back it up with expectations and consequences you plan on enforcing.
The bottom line is that our daughters need to know they are important and respected by us. If they don’t they’re likely to behave in ways that are negative to the way they feel about themselves. Show her that you believe in her and have the confidence in her ability. This may not protect her from the harshness of the world but if she knows you are there for her it will help her through.