Vaginal Delivery: What Really Happens

Mom Stages - Birth

User Rating: / 4
PoorBest 

When I was having my first child, I was completely unprepared for what was about to take place "down there". I have since had 4 deliveries. A singleton, a set of twins and lastly a singleton. I am what the OB/GYN community calls "a pro". Not of course in the Michelle Duggar sense, but needless to say I know what I'm doing by now. So after our recent delivery of our fourth and final child, I realized something. There was a ton of mom's in labor and delivery with me that were terrified, having panic attacks and uncooperative with the nurses, causing long deliveries and unnecessary C-sections, because patience was wearing thin on all parties.

I say unnecessary, because if someone had just explained not only what was going on, but how to deal with it, they might have calmed the mother to be down and eliminated the tense muscles in her bottom that were causing baby to stay inside, probably terrified of what was going on. Mother after mother was offered (including myself) "Valium" and "Morphine," to "ease delivery". I'm sorry, but what?!? Did I just hear that right? Mother after mother being drugged instead of taught how to deliver. I realized that I had my first 3 children in a different state and with different tact's of labor and delivery, but come on. Is medicinal applications during labor and delivery regional?

I am now assuming yes and have decided to write this article, so that it may be universal and maybe save some mother and baby from having to drug themselves up and maybe cut up, when all they needed to do was focus and relax.

First of all, no one bothers to tell you that pushing a baby out of your vagina, means mentally telling your body to push with your rear end. Pretty much like trying have a very large bowel movement and your constipated. Even though you have been taught your whole life and during your whole pregnancy not to do that, as it will cause Hemorroids, this is what you need to do, to push a baby out. If you mentally use all your power to push what you think is something out of your vagina, you will get no where fast. Going against all of your mental programming is also the certainty that you will not only "fart," but "have a bowel movement" on the nurses and doctors and whom ever else is in the room, which is the thee most unlady like thing you can do, or so your programmed to think.

During this undetermined amount of time and pain, you will essentially be mentally overriding all that you know and trying to get your mind and body to work in harmony to have the largest bowel movement every, no matter what comes out of your body, in the presence of strangers, family and whom ever else you invite to this event. The result will be a baby! I promise.

Then you also have to mentally prepare yourself for the feeling of pushing a baby out of your vagina, even though you are trying to think about pushing something out of your bum. Epidural or not, you are going to feel this. The epidural may help with contractions and such, but if you are in the pushing stage, the strong desire to push and get it over with will override the epidural. So you have to prepare yourself for this. I liken it to when you have a gut wrenching intestinal bug and you really need to go to the bathroom and everything in your body is working to squeeze that bug out of your intestines. You cannot do anything, but roll with it. Your whole body will role with a contraction that will vibrated from rib all the way down your thighs and that sensation to push whatever or in this case whom ever out of your body will overwhelm you.

You will then have to take in a deep breath (so not to pass out) and put your chin to your chest, grab your legs by the thighs and pull them up towards you and push mentally in your bum to get rid of this feeling. Then you will start to feel a burning sensation in your vaginal area. It is the baby's head pushing its way out. Now some women have episiotomies and I have not had to have one of these, so if you do need this, I am sorry, I cannot offer any first hand information on this matter. I have had the luck of several great nurses who spend the time, while I'm pushing, to stretch the peri-vaginal region with their gloved fingers, to help assist in the stretching of that skin for baby not to tear me.

So as I was saying, this burning that comes with baby stretching the vagina for exit, then mentally clashes with all that you are trying to program your body to do at the time and you really need to maintain focus and perseverance, otherwise you will suck that baby back up and all efforts are lost. With all this focus, keep trying to push out of your bum, keep the method of tucking chin, pulling legs, taking deep breath's and ignoring all things that are coming out of your bum at the time, all while hoping it is over soon. Essentially, your a plate spinner. Keep it all going and you are good. You will be exhausted on all fronts and people are standing around looking at you in all your glory. The pressure is overwhelming, but you have to be able to shut it all out.

Then the moment comes. You know you are one or two pushes away from that baby coming out and just then everyone tells you to stop and hold it. Hold it! Did they just say stop!?! You want to scream and beat someone up, but you are too busy trying not to let go of what is the head of your baby trying to emerge. For you it will be like trying to hold in a bad taco from a bar in Mexico. You hear the doctor being called, but then they arrive and you have to wait for them to put their gloves on, put cover up's on all parts (because god forbid they get dirty) and just in time to catch the baby (you hope) and take all the credit for delivery. Even though all the nurses did all the work of delivery and you did all the work of labor. I say give the mom and nurses the doctor's paycheck and we can all over look this little discrepancy.

Now a little more on that head emerging. Once the head emerges, you are not done. The relief that comes with that head coming out is enough for you to relax for a second, but then comes the shoulders which for some can be more painful that the head itself. Then the rest of the baby comes out and all you feel is a squishy, slimy, quick moving object pass through and your whole bottom region is screaming in relief and burning from stretching. You finally stop gripping the bars on the bedside and you can stop trying to spin those plates, but just then the doctor lets you know they are going to deliver (or you hope they tell you) the placenta. They do this while they clean your baby and you wait to hear the cry of the living, human being created by you and your partner.

The feeling of the placenta being delivered was dependent on the doctor that delivered. The first one was screamingly painful, uncomfortable and similar to ripping of a scab on a large wound, when it wasn't ready. I cried. Then for my twins, I had to go through it twice. It was very similar to the first one, but lessened in strength, but hated just as much. Then with my fourth and final one, I can honestly say I felt it very lightly. The doctor took his time taking the placenta from my uterus and did it in small steps until it detached and then he delivered it, which felt like a big, glob of slimy gum coming out of my vagina. Gross, but that is what it was like. Then the after affects of my epidural kicked in and I shook and teeth chattered until it was out of my system.

With your baby in your arms and at different points being cared for and checked out by nurses, your body will undergo a lot of changes. If you had an epidural, once that is out of your system, your body is then beginning the healing process. It will be sore and foreign to you for some time afterwards. I'm sure this process is different for every woman. The nurses will give you numbing stuff for your vaginal care and stool softeners to help you move them. Your body is in shock essentially and not only are you going to be mentally afraid to have a bowel movement, but your body is swollen and all out of whack. Your uterus will be contracting to go back to normal size and you will be bleeding and urinating all over the place until that heals. The urinating on yourself varies in amount of time for healing, but takes the full 6 weeks usually to be back to its pre-baby self and for some of us, not even then. The bleeding depends on how long it takes for your uterus to heal. Usually within 24 hours the stool softeners will help you with the bowel movement and the nurses will expect you to empty your bladder shortly after giving birth and if you are like me, you had a catheter during delivery (various reasons) and you will urinate blood for a while and it will burn, but if you don't urinate on your own, they will take it from you, via catheter again.

Not to mental all the blood pressure readings and baby monitoring during delivery, they do one last check of temps and blood pressures before heading you and baby off to recovery with baby. All in all, this whole process will leave your vagina sore, swollen, bruised and in some serious need for a day at the spa. So take care of yourself and take care of your vagina, because we all know you will need it again. Follow doctors orders and wait the 6 weeks before engaging in any activity that requires insertion of anything in there. Not only for bacteria reasons during healing, but also because you want the vagina to heal fully and not be the stretched out cave that we all fear will happen once we deliver a child from there. Pre-baby vagina is just around the corner, just don't be in a rush to get there.

Vaginal delivery can be a happy, productive, drug free (give or take an epidural) experience, but it is up to the mom to be informed and in control. Don't allow fear or medical degree's get in the way of what is to be a positive, loving experience for you and baby. Your vagina will thank you later.

| More...

Comments

Search RSS

adventuroo (Author) 2010-01-12 03:33:47 Now THAT'S what I needed to know! I had a C-section with my first and am planning to try a VBAC with my second one (coming up in March). I never got to the pushing stages last time nor the aftermath so I appreciate your candid descriptions. Funny enough, the article doesn't scare me off one bit-- in fact, it eases my mind a good deal! Thanks!

rabbitxx2 (Author) 2010-01-12 14:59:08 I wish I had read this before I had my first child. You're dead on regarding this subject. After all the advice everyone loved to give during preganancy -- nobody came forward to warn me about delivery and the post-delivery challenges.

artificiallyawake (Author) 2010-01-14 05:35:20 Glad you both liked it! I try to be honest and candid, because no one was with me. Why candy coat things? It doesn't help anyone. I appreciate the feedback Thanks!

Only registered users can write comments!

Powered by !JoomlaComment 3.26

3.26 Copyright (C) 2008 Compojoom.com / Copyright (C) 2007 Alain Georgette / Copyright (C) 2006 Frantisek Hliva. All rights reserved."